Fetch Me A Stepladder

I don't say much on my blog about people I know personally - I figure they have a right to a certain amount of privacy, even here, and it is in any event a fairly lame maneuver to gripe about people in a forum they don't even know about. And then there's the basic fact that I don't have much to complain about in the first place; people are almost invariably nice to me.

But, having said that, I have to say that I've survived a heart attack, open-heart surgery, cancer, a mountain of chemo and two bone marrow transplants, and I'm coming to understand that I'm under no obligation to weather abuse. I may, but I don't have to.

So with that in mind, I'm going to keep a stepladder handy, because I'm slowly compiling a list of people who can kiss my ass. And I figure the least I can do is climb a stepladder first so they don't have to bend over too far when kissing my ass.

I'm nothing if not thoughtful.

Dear Blogger

Dear Blogger,

When do you propose to do anything about this recent epidemic of chuckleheads posting bullshit comments that are nothing more than deceitful links to what appear to be Asian porn sites? I seem to spend more time killing these bullshit comments than I do posting, and it's getting really irritating.

I tried to "Notify Blogger" but I ended up tattling on myself!

This is crazy. All I ask is that you turn off links in comments - I don't care what they say in the comments, I just don't like all those hidden links lurking like time bombs in my blog.

Failing that, I may have to shut off comments altogether, which would be unfortunate, but I do so hate my blog being violated by a bunch of 14-year-old knuckleheads. And if that doesn't work, I can go somewhere else.

Thanks for nothing, because I know you won't do anything about it.