Weekend Update with Dennis Miller

No, not with Dennis Miller. Anyone but Dennis Miller.

I think my cat Poopie is dying, but I've thought that before, haven't I? She has new symptoms in that she's apparently gone stone deaf. She doesn't seem to be suffering and she still eats me out of house and home, so I don't feel that I'm at the point where I have to decide if I should have her put to sleep or not. Her deafness is kind of a bother, actually. She doesn't realize how loud she has become, and you can't shut her up with a strategic hissing sound either. But you can sneak up on her from behind quite readily, and send her into the lower troposphere by poking her. That's dirty pool, but so is waking me up at 4:30 in the morning with earsplittingly-loud yowling sung in a minor and sort of flattish key.

Poopie was my third cat. My first cat, Oberon, was handed to me by my friend's mom when I went to visit her. Then someone at work gave me another kitten that I named Hobbes. After a few years Hobbes developed Valley Fever. We (the vet and I) kept him alive for about six months with various anti-fungal medications, and he actually seemed to be getting better, but then the bottom fell out. He grew horrible granulomas on his legs, he went blind, and within a day or two he died of encephalitis. I didn't take that very well. It was my first pet death in many years, and I was fairly devastated. So the next day I went to the Humane Society and vowed to adopt the first kitten that approached me, and that happened to be Poopie. And now she's failing, and the cycle will renew itself. Max, by the way, was rescued from the Safeway. He was sheltering behind the bike rack, just a tiny little puffball of a kitten, and we brought him home. He's not doing so well himself, but he's pretty elderly too. Not as old as Poopie, but a respectable old age for a cat. Before long the cat banner will pass to Baxter, I think, and then we'll have to decide if we want to replenish the cat population or not.

After having vacuumed up about three and a half tons of cat hair over the years, I'm inclined to say "One cat is plenty."